5 responses

  1. Vision

    Well, let’s see if this works
    If this lifts—What?
    The crushing
    Nothingness of all.

    Ah-ha! It does!
    But I shall not tell—
    Nor risk this secret
    Less intense

    Oh, what the hell…
    If millions know…
    It’s reading Patrick’s
    Next haiku!

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  2. Oh wow, okay, the second haiku from the top is something different. Is it perhaps a one-off, exotic (haha) haiku-ic license thing being done here? Or is this maybe an exploration into new frontiers of your practice—kind of like, how much can you bend the framework/rules (in absence of a better word for whatever familiar structure you use in these haikus)? So, maybe keeping in line with having just one ‘unit’ of some sort in the first and third breaks/lines of the haiku, you pushed beyond having a whole word…

    Is it bad if I maybe ask you about the creative process behind it? ಠ◡ಠ

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    • I’ve read that Japanese Haiku are understood as being one sentence poems with a tripartite form. Hiroaki Sato translates the haiku of Basho’s “Journey to the North” as one sentence poems. On the other hand, Japanese poets like Basho, Buson and Issa would sometimes write their haiku in three vertical lines. So there’s that. When I settled on my own form I cared less for the syllable count than for the poetic feel of the haiku, and so they’re a bit like a cross between three line and single line poems. (The 5/7/5 form in English is almost always too wordy. When translators try to translate Japanese haiku into an English language 5/7/5 syllable count, they nearly always have to add words that aren’t in the original.) I think of my own haiku as single line poems with a tripartite form. So, this is just a long way of saying that I could have added more to the haiku to make it more like my others, but I couldn’t think of anything that wouldn’t have been extraneous, and so I used the tripartite line-breaks to play with the words themselves. I liked how, when I split wi-nd between two lines, the effect was somewhat like the wind—a sort of disappearing/vanishing vowel. I’ve split words like that before when it struck me that the line-breaks might suggest a new or altered meaning—and because I wanted to avoid superfluity for the sake of form. Beyond that, I’m not sure what you mean by “creative process”? Usually my haiku begin with something I’ve seen, that seemed striking to me. And then there’s the trick of trying to capture that, sometimes, inexpressible impression in words.

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    • Oh my, thank you very much for the detailed reply, Mr. Gillespie! Although, ‘._. I could perhaps apologise for not having saved you some typing, since I’ve been following your blog for quite some long now and have read your “On Haiku” and other posts.
      That said, thank you again, for you did answer my curiosity :))
      The impression that you created (and described) with that word break was precisely what enchanted me, thus the curiosity. And what’s more, it’s inspiring!

      Yup, that’s the creative process more or less.

      Godspeed, Bottlecap!

      .•)

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