Voracious
Ugly caterpillar do do your thing
Again!
Speaking of dragonflies…
Mating in dragonflies is a complex, precisely choreographed process. First, the male has to attract a female to his territory, continually driving off rival males. When he is ready to mate, he transfers a packet of sperm from his primary genital opening on segment 9, near the end of his abdomen, to his secondary genitalia on segments 2–3, near the base of his abdomen. The male then grasps the female by the head with the claspers at the end of his abdomen; the structure of the claspers varies between species, and may help to prevent interspecific mating.[42] The pair flies in tandem with the male in front, typically perching on a twig or plant stem. The female then curls her abdomen downwards and forwards under her body to pick up the sperm from the male’s secondary genitalia, while the male uses his “tail” claspers to grip the female behind the head: this distinctive posture is called the “heart” or “wheel”;[33][43] the pair may also be described as being “in cop”.[44]
So, you’re the expert on erotic poetry. Anything sound familiar here?
You’ve violated the rules of my Very Brief Art of Haiku. :) Words like “Beauty” and “Ugly” are ultimately abstract and convey nothing about the butterfly or caterpillar. That said, poets use words like these in Haiku ever day. My own preference is for very imagistic haiku. As little abstract as possible.
Thanks. No comments on my site and hardly any traffic at all unless I visit it. Which is just as well, because I’m perfectly comfortable with solitude. Nevertheless, I still like to think I’ve written some of the most perfect short poems in the English language, and I welcome the day you and William Logan confirm that.
Yes, the Victorian “heaven’s wings” did seem a little posed based on my previous poems, but the only alternative I can think of at the moment is “Bloom / Crysalis, humbly, our hope that she will / stay” Is that better? Or maybe “that bliss will / stay”
Metamorphosis lite? In this version I tried to compensate for the lost wing in the last stanza by shifting it to the first and lightening it up imagistically by substituting air (concrete) for death (abstraction).
The Metamorphosis
Eye
Behold a butterfly, wings banter to the
Air
One
Egg stuck to a milkweed and off to Adam’s
Peak
Chew
Voracious caterpillar to bring her back to
Life
Bloom
Chrysalis, humbly, our hope that bliss will
Stay
55: July 14th 2020 | bottlecap
This one prompted me to read the entire wiki entry on butterflies. Its beauty is the briefest of its stages–on average a month. Hence:
Beauty
Of a butterfly and just a month to
Live
One
Egg stuck to a milkweed then off to Adam’s
Peak
Ugly
Caterpillar do do your thing
Again!
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And I just saw my first dragonfly today. :)
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Meter adjusted:
Voracious
Ugly caterpillar do do your thing
Again!
Speaking of dragonflies…
Mating in dragonflies is a complex, precisely choreographed process. First, the male has to attract a female to his territory, continually driving off rival males. When he is ready to mate, he transfers a packet of sperm from his primary genital opening on segment 9, near the end of his abdomen, to his secondary genitalia on segments 2–3, near the base of his abdomen. The male then grasps the female by the head with the claspers at the end of his abdomen; the structure of the claspers varies between species, and may help to prevent interspecific mating.[42] The pair flies in tandem with the male in front, typically perching on a twig or plant stem. The female then curls her abdomen downwards and forwards under her body to pick up the sperm from the male’s secondary genitalia, while the male uses his “tail” claspers to grip the female behind the head: this distinctive posture is called the “heart” or “wheel”;[33][43] the pair may also be described as being “in cop”.[44]
So, you’re the expert on erotic poetry. Anything sound familiar here?
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I assume my audience would be dragonflies, but writing in dragonfly has never been my strong suit. I would probably just make a mess of things.
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I happen to think that dragonfly sex has the potential for a good poem.
Btw, does this as adjusted rate at least Doggerel Plus?
The Metamorphosis
Beauty
Of a butterfly and just a month to
Live
One
Egg stuck to a milkweed then off to Adam’s
Peak
Voracious
Ugly caterpillar does his thing
Again
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You’ve violated the rules of my Very Brief Art of Haiku. :) Words like “Beauty” and “Ugly” are ultimately abstract and convey nothing about the butterfly or caterpillar. That said, poets use words like these in Haiku ever day. My own preference is for very imagistic haiku. As little abstract as possible.
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thanks. That bit of advice may have given me another one-hit wonder. Reality check?
The Metamorphosis
Eye
Behold a butterfly, lighter than its
Death
One
Egg stuck to a milkweed and off to Adam’s
Peak
Chew
Voracious caterpillar to bring her back to
Life
Bloom
Chrysalis, humbly, our hope of heaven’s
Wings
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Hey Cliff. Any feedback on your post at your blog? My only comment would be that the last “haiku” strikes a somewhat Victorian pose. :)
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Pingback: The Metamorphosis – Poemways
Thanks. No comments on my site and hardly any traffic at all unless I visit it. Which is just as well, because I’m perfectly comfortable with solitude. Nevertheless, I still like to think I’ve written some of the most perfect short poems in the English language, and I welcome the day you and William Logan confirm that.
Yes, the Victorian “heaven’s wings” did seem a little posed based on my previous poems, but the only alternative I can think of at the moment is “Bloom / Crysalis, humbly, our hope that she will / stay” Is that better? Or maybe “that bliss will / stay”
LikeLike
Metamorphosis lite? In this version I tried to compensate for the lost wing in the last stanza by shifting it to the first and lightening it up imagistically by substituting air (concrete) for death (abstraction).
The Metamorphosis
Eye
Behold a butterfly, wings banter to the
Air
One
Egg stuck to a milkweed and off to Adam’s
Peak
Chew
Voracious caterpillar to bring her back to
Life
Bloom
Chrysalis, humbly, our hope that bliss will
Stay
LikeLike
Adam’s Peak is known as the place “where butterflies go to die.” But I could achieve a better rhyme with “Adam’s Lair”
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ok. I slept on it and got this.
The Metamorphosis
Eye
Behold a butterfly, wings banter on the
Air
One
Egg stuck to a milkweed and off to Adam’s
Lair
Chew
Voracious caterpillar to bring her back to
Life
Bloom
Chrysalis, humbly, our hope that bliss will
Stay
LikeLike
Read it aloud several times tonight and got this. Improvement?
The Metamorphosis
Eye
Behold a butterfly, wings banter with the
Air
Egg
Stuck to a milkweed and off to Adam’s
Lair
Chew
Voracious caterpillar to bring her back to
Life
Bloom
Chrysalis, humbly, our hope that bliss will
Last
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