3 responses

  1. Anything redeeming here?

    Loving Donny

    My sexuality is kind of fluid
    When I like men I like their women
    My buddy screws his twice a day
    And the more he does the more I think
    I might could find a prostitute—
    But on second thought
    (My luck with women what it is)
    She’d be a walking petri dish
    Else an undercover cop
    And handcuffs on the nightly news
    Is not a bondage I prefer.
    Or perhaps I need a different buddy–
    One sprayed orange, without tattoos,
    Who found his gal in old Slovenia
    Who–if he gets it up at all–
    Exhausted from a full night’s tweeting–
    Keeps it always missionary.
    What Donny Trump could do for me!
    Then instead of desperate tryst
    I end up with a fashion model
    So hot with her vocabulary
    “Oh Cliff! Ah Cliff! My Cliff!”
    [Screams] “You stable genius, you!”
    One could do worse than loving


    • Doesn’t rise above doggerel. “She”d be a walking petri dish,” flirts too near misogyny. While a woman may suffer from STDs, a man may also; but referring to a woman as a “walking petri dish” is dehumanizing and makes the narrator sound like a self-absorbed jerk. One may object that this is what the narrator is supposed to sound like, but if so, then all his other utterances become suspect. The problem right now, is that the poem feels mean-spirited and dismissive rather than humorous.


  2. Thanks. Yes, I agree with you. And arrogant. Something a character could say (in a play, novel), but misplaced as the voice of the poet. And I do sympathize with troubled or outcast women.


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